True Encounters

Tuesday July 25, 2006

True Encounters

Yes I do have a lot of these strange encounters, and all of them are true.

I get to go to quite a few presentations as part of my paid work, usually demos for various bits and pieces of new software. Half of the time nothing works in these demonstrations and our poor network usually gets the blame. The other half of the time, ‘other factors’ cause the demo to be squeezed into a fraction of its planned running time. These factors range between the heatwave and our lack of air conditioning, rescheduling on our part, lateness and general confusion of our visiting demonstrators, and our poor network.

When we are treated to something that resembles a demonstration, we invariably don’t learn as much as we could. It’s usually the case that our carefully prepared questions are carefully noted because they cannot be answered. These are the queries that cannot be attributed to ‘network concerns’, but they are easy questions nevertheless.

I’ve found myself pre-empting the reactions to these bog-standard queries. I recently followed the question “will it work on different browsers?” with “please don’t say IE only!” when it was met with a blank stare. I worry that I’m becoming a Touretter of web standards and accessibility, uncontrollably shouting “Mozilla Firefox!” when anyone says “browser”. Whenever Windows is mentioned I am often heard to bellow “Mac user, Safari!” and most of the time I am perched on the edge of my seat, ready to utter “text-only equivalent!” whenever dubious looking graphics are introduced.

All a bit worrying, really. “Hand-held devices!” Blimey, I really can’t stop it now.

Hehe, I’ve sat through far too many of those sales pitches for a young lad of my age.

When we get that blank, “we-know-nothing-at-all-about-the-web-even-though-we’re=trying- to-sell-you-our-web-module” stare from suppliers pitching for business I wish I had the nerve to stand up, offer my hand and say, “Well, thanks very much for your time, but you’re clearly charlatans and we’d be insane to contract with you”.

But I never do. And someone more senior than me usually signs them up on the spot. sigh.

Dan Champion    26 July, 11:18 AM   

Once they know you’re the ‘web man’ they either direct the whole presentation at you, or completely avoid eye contact. They'll decide to try and charm you. Or they'll fear you. There’s no in-between.

Stephen    26 July, 01:35 PM   

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